Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Naked Rubber Chicken Furor
So you know, most of the time the pet business is a relatively safe and fun business. 99% of the time the people that come into the store are totally cool. They bring their pets and aside from an occasional misplaced pee-pee or poop or puddle of drool, things go well. We all have fun. We sell nice foods, we sell tasty treats, and we sell doggie and kitty toys. What could be wrong with that?
Funny you should ask.
It's the end of the day and we're getting ready to close. The phone rings and a rather desperate sounding man asks if we are the store with the "naked chickens" in the window. Thinking it's one of our friends, Lisa S. says "Why yes, we are."
At this point the guy gets a touch mental and accuses us of selling "pornographic materials" (in the form of a rubber chicken dog toy). He asks how he is supposed to walk his children by our store and explain to them why there are naked chickens in the window. He begs us to remove them so he and his children can walk the streets unmolested by the buxom, suggestive, and latex Henrietta Chicken.
Lisa explained to him that all chickens are naked, they usually don't wear clothes. By contrast, Henrietta was wearing a purple polka dot bikini, and so was not naked.
He remained unconvinced. He threatened to call the Mayor's office and report us. (I am not sure which department of Mayor Menino's office deals with rubber chickens. I'll get back to you kids on that.)
I've posted a picture of Ms. Henrietta Chicken, a dog toy, so that you can judge for yourselves.
I'm also adding an excerpt from her bio so you all can get a taste of who she really is.
"Now retired, Henrietta lives a quiet life, far from the Vegas footlights, in a swanky trailer park near Fort Lauderdale. Hand painted, poly-filled latex dog toy. De-feathered for canine pleasure. She comes in two sizes."